A quiet weekend. You know how when life goes back to normal after lots of excitement there’s sometimes that feeling of let down? I guess that’s the best way to describe how I’m feeling. The pressure of NaNo is off, I don’t really have anything going except work, and I think that’s getting me down. It’s an odd thing to complain about, I know, but that’s the way I am. So I’m keeping busy and just getting through.

Shawn and Michelle both finished their NaNovels. Sarah came close, and I dropped out before 30,000. Not sure how the rest of the Champaign kids did.

Finally got a chance to watch Million Dollar Hotel this weekend. I was pretty obsessed with the movie in London but somehow never got around to watching it. I liked it a lot. Not sure if I’d recommend it for everyone, but it’s definitely a quality bit of film. “The heart is a sleeping beauty and love the only kiss it can’t resist. Even if its eyes lay open wide, there is a heart that sleeps inside. And it’s to there you must be hastening. For all hearts dream, they dream only of awakening.”

Ummm, what else. Played lots of YoHoHo Puzzle Pirates – watched Monsters Inc (adorable) and Femme Fatale (sketchy) – wrote some letters – finished my latest knitting project – slept and lounged around a lot – didn’t bother getting dressed until almost 10 (pm, that is). I guess that’s it. I’m just – blah.

Outdated but could be cute

Today has been the wicked-boringest day ever. I’m not sure what the boredom book would say about that statement – but, here’s the thing. I’m not allowed to read, I’m not allowed to write, I can use the internet judiciously but not excessively, I can’t wander around, etc. I’m basically paid to sit in my chair and wait for customers to come to my window – with a few brief exceptions. We’ve been hella dead this last week, and I’ve exhausted all the cleaning and busy work I can think of. I have my knitting and my book with me – but I would get in trouble if I took them out. So….I sit.

Thinking about going to see The Singing Detective tonight at the art theater. I’m ghetto broke (think $45.54 left after paying bills – wait, sorry, make that $45.53) – but I cashed in my “fun fund” change today and am $13-or-so richer. I’ll probably also spend quality time reading and writing letters and drinking hot cocoa – all good cold-weekend-y things to do. Hoping the boy will be home tonight, but really have no idea on that one.

Yesterday we ransacked Grandma’s closet, meaning I came home with all sorts of outdated but could be cute things – skirts and jackets and blouses and – best of all – sweaters! I’ve fallen hardcore in love with the new-old rose cardigan I’m wearing today. Going through the stuff was hard for Mom – but I would rather do it now, with Grandma’s help, than wait. She’s willing to get rid of things now which to us indicates a thought towards leaving the house – and I suppose we have to act on these moments whenever they come around.

There and back again

I survived the holiday and the drive without much ado. Left here at 7:30 in Davenport around 10:30 family arrived shortly thereafter – dinner around 2 – going through clothes while the kids played – reading and talking and knitting and eating – left Dav around 5:30 back home with tickets to Return of the King by 8:30. No email AT ALL today – however did find a randomly hidden comment on the old site, which was exciting. Missing my down-here friends as they’re all with family in various places – Newman and Jen bowed out of visiting due to finances – and I think I just lost at my NaNo quest. I have three days to write in excess of 22,000 words in three days and with no plot or character development in mind, it simply isn’t going to happen. You can read my review of my novel, however.. A long, boring, and lonely weekend stretches out in front of me. At least I got to see my family. I forgot how much I adore and miss them.

Oh, and pies may be nice (see 11/15 entry), but if I eat one more piece of any kind of pie in the near future I really might explode and thus have to swear off pies for life. Don’t make me do it.

It’s Wednesday but feels like Friday – I didn’t get much sleep, and I’m feeling random. Work is slooooooooow with all the students gone – my friends are leaving town today for their various destinations – I have a novel to write and nothing coming. I could leave for Iowa tonight, but that doesn’t seem like a real option. Newman was supposed to join us for Thanksgiving but will instead be staying home – unless my hare-brained scheme comes to fruition. I would love to do anything I could to have her with us – but I don’t know if I’m up for all the driving.

SO, instead of playing at work or writing, here’s my on-the-fly Christmas list:
a microwave
a tv bigger than a toaster (seriously, my toaster is bigger than the tv I have right now)
The Fellowship of the Ring extended edition
The Two Towers extended edition
a non-stick skillet
a serrated Wusthof knife
Tori’s Tales of a Librarian
anything by Elliott Smith
my kitties
a cute ankle-length black skirt that is work appropriate
tickets to see Damien some time soon

Sunday morning – well, afternoon – and I’m 4,000 words up on the NaNo novel, but haven’t accomplished much else. It’s sort of nice, actually, after the craziness of this last week. I’m reading The Waste Lands and will probably finish that this afternoon – not sure what’s next. I should be working on the novel – or at least cleaning my apartment – but it’s a grey day and just lying around seems like a better option.

The Friday Five:
1. List five things you’d like to accomplish by the end of the year.

    Finish my grad school application.
    Pay my therapy bill.
    Finish my NaNo novel.
    Do my Christmas shopping.
    Buy either a boxspring or a couch.

2. List five people you’ve lost contact with that you’d like to hear from again.

    Melissa Kellerhals.
    Allen Wiser-Amos.
    Brett Pierce.
    Trevor Gilchrist.
    Tim Johnson.

3. List five things you’d like to learn how to do.

    Grow a successful garden.
    Ballroom dance.
    Speak Spanish.
    Do my hair.
    Make a relationship work.

4. List five things you’d do if you won the lottery (no limit).

    Work only when I wanted to, doing things that make me happy.
    Live in Europe for a while. Maybe New Zealand too.
    Buy everything on my Amazon wish list – and then some.
    Buy a new pretty-pretty Audi.
    Buy a house for all my kids so we can live in communal bliss. Or something.

5. List five things you do that help you relax.

    Drink tea
    Take baths.
    Walk in my park.
    Play with Sarah and Hannah’s kitties – Elijah, you’re my boy!
    Cook.

Happy Birthday, Shawn! 57,000,000 micromachines can’t tell you the half of it.

Thanksgiving was a beautiful, beautiful success. Everyone looked great – the food was wonderful – we finished cooking with plenty of time to relax – I didn’t butcher the turkey – no one was attacked by pie – everyone had much to be thankful for. Nick & Jessica’s peanut butter pumpkin soup was awesome – Amity whipped the cream by herself (naked?!?!) – Sara & Adam brought green bean casserole (my favorite) – Sam & Brian brought tasty cornmeal muffins – and Joan brought a tasty, tasty salad. Sarah, Hannah, Shawn, and I made turkey, tofurkey, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, broccoli, kugel, cranberry sauce, and allllllll the pies. Chris swapped nametags so as to hit on Amity as different people (including He-Man and Dirty, Dirty Aragorn) – the “kiddie table” sang along with Damien – and we all said the things we are thankful for. There was so much I wanted to say – but I couldn’t without crying – instead I said “I am thankful for the chance at a new beginning.” What I should have said:
I am thankful for Sarah, without whom I would not have survived.
I am thankful for Hannah and Amity and all my new friends and family here.
I am thankful for a roof over my head, food on my table, and money in the bank.
I am thankful for the possibility of grad school.
I am thankful for shelter and comfort and encouragement and peace and so much love.
I am thankful for my family and friends and all those who love me no matter what.
I am thankful for Shawn, who has given more to me than I could have ever asked or hoped for.

Woah, an interview with Damien on CNN.com!!!

OK, I digress. An exciting night. I just got home after cooking for approx 7 hours – starting at 5:30 with peeling potatoes, finishing around 12:30 with the last of the kitchen clean up. After consulting with her dad regarding her ever worsening cough and breathing, Sarah went to the ER with Hannah in tow. Shawn and I held down the fort, finished the cooking, and generally exempted ourselves from dish duty for tomorrow night. Sarah’s going to be fine and sounds worlds better already – we had fun cooking (though not so much when the pumpkin pie attacked), and tomorrow night is going to be wonderful.

Now – sleep.

Sitting around listening to David Gray and procrastinating. It’s late, and I should be asleep. Actually, I should be making satay, THEN sleeping. Instead I’m doing neither.

Went to a talk by the kid(s) behind FOUND Magazine tonight – it was damned funny. Apparently they have a book coming out in the spring, which I will definitely have to buy.

It’s been raining most of the day – cold, wet, fall rain. I walked from work to the Art & Design building for the talk tonight as the rain pelted my face, my hair, my clothes, soaking me to the bone. It felt like London again – the dark wet streets, the constant rain, the smile I couldn’t wipe off my face. I didn’t mind the cold and the wet – just, the rain on my face making me happy and peaceful.

I love the rain so much, even when it’s dismal. I love walking in the rain in the summertime – walking in the rain hand in hand, stopping to kiss in the downpour. I love the sound of rain outside my window as I go to sleep. I love the cool breezes that prick my skin during a storm.

And I love the way love is like a downpour, the way love pricks my skin, the way love brings soft noises to lull me to sleep. I want my kiss to linger like the summer rain.