naming

it is 2:30 and i’m not tired at all. two twelve hour days in a row – some school, some goofing off, some work. time split between two offices, two jobs in one building. new friends. old friends. new things.

tonight i watched the tech room so dan could pick up dinner for us. we ate thai and watched the state of the union on my laptop. i can’t tell you why that was a perfect moment, but it was – two liberal GAs in a liberal office in a liberal program sitting in this little room nominally working, but mainly discussing politics and eating with chopsticks while dan’s awesome dog wandered around.

dan asked me if my name is officially “e” because he never sees it written as elizabeth or Elizabeth or E – tonight i was eTech. i don’t know how to shape my thoughts on self-naming, so i’ll try my best here. for ages i was liz, then elizabeth, then e. always e. now i am no longer liz, save to a few who call me that despite my best efforts. to one i was always elizabeth. to many i am only e. what do these names say about me? how do they shape my self-perception?

i’ve been listening to a lot of music lately – new music, old music, new-to-me music. tonight after dan left i put on my big leep headphones and just got lost. my mixtrade disc is finished and, while not as stunning as i’d hoped, is pretty damned good. over the weekend gavin sent me gary numan’s absolution. right now i am sitting in my chair in my dark apartment with my earbuds in and my eyes closed, just letting the music sink in.

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0 thoughts on “naming

  1. i sympathize. to avoid violence (long story) my parents had to americanize my name initially. so, lots of detroiters still call me ‘eddie’, a name i despise! now i’m ‘oday’, or ‘o’, or ‘o-gay’. when i was a rapper in high school (long story), i went by ‘dj iq’ and ‘mc genius’. but you can call me phil…

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