towards the camino

more concrete steps towards the camino – today i talked to jill about taking time off next summer. had she said no, it would’ve meant the end of that dream for now. but she said yes, shouldn’t be a problem, and that i might even have vacation time. i’ll check with suzi when i get back, but that’s one less big thing to worry about. now – finances, fitness, etc. i’m glad i decided on this now, not impulsively a few months before the fact like i did with france. but this is something bigger.

tomorrow i’m leaving for california and will be spending four days with the family. this will be a challenge. i’m not ready to talk to mom yet. i don’t know if she’ll understand. in fact, i know she won’t. again this feels like a love affair i must keep secret because no one will understand. i am not ashamed by any means, but some people will get it and others won’t – so i am testing the waters gingerly.

today i was very tired and irritable and burned out.

from glimpses of grace:

“Faith and religion are not the same thing. Although my faith may falter, it has to do with the constancy of God’s love. Religion, which is the expression of faith, may find different expressions appropriate in different times and places and to different people, and the variety of these expressions can enlarge our perception and deepen our faith.”

n loaned me the mystic heart and i have been reading it these last two days, though the essence of it is in the above paragraph. religion and faith. i love that they can coexist but don’t have to. this is what mom won’t understand.

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