This article says a lot of what I’m thinking and feeling. I’m frustrated by the incredible divide that makes talking about politics or “the issues” with my family difficult – and nearly impossible for some of my friends and their families. I feel like my hands are tied, and I don’t know where to start. Moving to Canada was half-seriously suggested to me by my uncle, and I immediately rejected the suggestion because running away would mean accepting defeat. I want to make change happen. I just don’t know where to start.
I’m just – distracted these days, I guess. I’m trying to work on my novel, but it just isn’t coming. I can’t get behind the story, and even making it more personal isn’t helping. I sit here in front of the laptop and just – stare until I get distracted by the TV or my email or my own exhaustion. Saturday afternoon I nearly tossed the entire thing to start over – I’m feeling that way again tonight. Week Three’s supposed to be the really bad one, but the NaNo doldrums are hitting me early this year.
As of right now I am officially off work until Thursday, which is an amazing feeling after working six weeks straight. I’m heading home for a couple of days – a whirlwind trip with nearly every minute planned out, but it’ll be a nice change of scenery. I get to see Ludo tomorrow night in Madison – the last show of their fall tour – and will get to spend quality time with my family – my sister in particular.
I don’t know. I feel – more grown up right now than I have in a long time. And that’s kind of odd. Much love to all – I’ll be back in a few days.