birthday brunch

i apologize for the morose posts this week. i’ve been in a funk and i just can’t explain it. i think it has a lot to do with last weekend – and with grad school. i’m seriously thinking about the university of wisconsin school of library and information studies – to study library science in particular. a couple of problems – i don’t live in wisconsin. tuition for residents is around $5000/year. tuition for non-residents is around $17000/year. so, you say, why not just move there, establish residency, and be done with it? it takes a year to establish residency in the state of wisconsin. meaning that if we found a place tomorrow, we’d have to break our lease, move to wisconsin, get new jobs (well, i would – nate already works in madison), and live there for a whole year before i could even apply! now, it’s likely we won’t move until springtime because we just moved two months ago. application for the fall semester ends december 15. so if we move in may of 2003, the earliest i could conceivably start school would be january 2005. that is, if they allow you to start at the half. i’m excited about the possibility of a move, about going to school – but i’m depressed because at the minimum i can’t start for two years. and paying $35000 for a $10000 education is just out of the question. we’d be paying more for two years of graduate work at a public university than for four years (including a semester abroad) of undergraduate work at a private college. i think that’s most of what’s getting me down – that and pms

nate just doesn’t understand because he doesn’t see the rush. he feels like he’s giving me everything he has to give – and that’s not enough. he doesn’t understand that i am happy with him – it’s just these other circumstances in my life are depressing me. he seems to think that it’s a competition, that i have to have my degree before my friends do – well, that’s not going to happen and it isn’t the case anyway. i am depressed because i found something i want to do – and now i have to wait. am i crazy? maybe.

anyway, i should go – we’re having brunch with my family in an hour to celebrate my dad’s birthday – which isn’t until next weekend. why are we celebrating today instead of next weekend? no one seems to know. oh well, free breakfast is good by me!

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